The Test

Yesterday, my husband had to go into the clinic’s Audio Visual room to provide a “sample”.  It’s all part of the process of finding out why we keep losing our babies.  I’ve already had several sonohysterograms, internal and external ultrasounds and blood tests.  There are more to come and we’re hoping to have some answers by the end of next month.  The dreaded answer is, “no answer”.

I’ve ALWAYS known that I wanted children.  For me to go through any kind of testing is a no brainer.  I will do whatever it takes.

For my husband it’s different.  Before meeting me (like many men) he hadn’t even thought about having children.  It meant a lot to me when he told me a few years ago that he wanted to have children with me.  It meant that I could keep him.

For him to go to the clinic and provide a “sample” was a big deal in my eyes.  I know it’s difficult, awkward and inconvenient.  Maybe that doesn’t compare to the poking and prodding that I’ve endured but things don’t always compare.

I think this test serves more than one purpose.  It will rule out or bring light to any sperm related issues connected to our losses.  It also put my husband’ dedication to the test.  Considering the efforts we’ve gone through to conceive and try to carry a baby, the efforts and finances that we’ve put forward towards the adoption I had no doubt that my husband wanted a family.  This “test” confirmed that even further.   A+!

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