home for the holidays

20121219-175411.jpgI’ve been dreading Christmas for quite a while now…and now it’s days away. Christmas is such a family holiday and I really thought I’d have my own family by now. ( I know, I have my husband, I have friends, I have extended family, but that’s not what I’m talking about). While all the friends that had babies on my due dates are having “Baby’s First Christmas”, my husband and I will be home, just the two of us. I don’t know why I can’t think of it as “just another day” – Maybe that’s because hubby insisted on putting up the world’s biggest Christmas tree! I know it will be fine. I’m lucky to have my fella and I’ll do my best just to enjoy our time alone together. Stay tuned…hopefully there will be a follow up entry called, “I Survived Christmas” or ” It Wasn’t So Bad”.

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4 thoughts on “home for the holidays

  1. I hear that! Also after 5 years of hoping this would be the year of the Christmas baby… my younger sis is pregnant and sharing out those horrific creepy ultrasound pics. Yaaaaay. I mean, obviously, yay this is wonderful for her and all of us. But how will I ever compartmentalize it enough to be a good sis to her and a good me to me? Bah.

    • I’m having trouble being a good sister too. This is part of why it will be just the two of us for Christmas. My “little” brother just made his big announcement and I feel better keeping my misery to myself. I’m getting worse at compartmentalizing and better at sobbing publicly.
      Bah is right!

      • I’ve gone through phases with it. Now it’s almost theatre of the absurd and I’m just living in the moment and accepting it. It has to be more funny than anything or I won’t get through. Other times I need to be 100% serious self care and say no to things. I know I will end up eventually having the convo where I let her know I can only take small doses and it isn’t her fault and I want to be there for her but I’m struggling. I have to trust her enough to tell her that, I think.

  2. Pingback: A Look Back and a Plan for the New Year | you can't choose when

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